Weltchmerz

Present, the oh -my -so- important,
sublimates into a bunch of faded memoirs
and yet i suffer, struggle , strive, fight for it.
The insignificance of being ,haunts me yet again
and still i protest giving up being a part of this gyre .

what am i but a part of you?

The bliss that i seek does not exist,
the redemption would be never complete,
smiles i forget, and pains count
and frame them on the dirty wall.
to stare at them each morning and night.

what am i but a prototype of us?

The crowd around me is most loathsome
and the silence in me eats me in parts ,
none is welcome ,yet i hate being a loner
never do i stop, think and look back.

what am i but a shadow of every body ?

She...

This pale body throbbing still with life ;
this tired skin covering up the spent mass;
this blub of silvery hair that outlines
the still vigorous mind , which pumps still and pumps,
unyielding to fatigue and death;
lies next to me,
breathing in a broken rhythm
yet claiming victory,
denies to resign from life.
She falls asleep amid a conversation,
of her chores and her tribulations ,
with the non chalant ears .
She sleeps,
as the body surrenders
and takes precendence over the mechanical mind.
She eases off for a second or two
till i wake her up
and mar her stolen moments of respite,
till i wake her up just out of habit-
"Ma! stop snoring. will you?"

the edge

Standing at the edge all the time ... on the edge..nor this part nor that but right there in the in- between domain , on that thin thin line walking with blades shredding your flesh and the blood, singing its elegy. you get niether this or that but always the left over...
or is it the other way round ..COULD BE is the best, in- between(?) answer.

--and the pink changes in to crimson--

kyun

kyun har dard ko baantu jab baantne se izzafa ho aansuon me
kyun har saans ko rokun jab saanse aati hi hain ruk ruk ke
kyun dhoondu jawab jab sawaal hi umadte nahi jee khol ke
kyun thamoon lamhe jab har lamha chede ek naye katl ki dhun
kyun in raaton ko kosun jab dinoka bhi ujale se rishta toot gaya
kyun naye sath ko tarsun jab puranon se hi thak ke damman choot gaya.

dard shabdon me baandhu to kaise
shabd bandh jayen to kya mushiklain assan nahi hongi?
agar koi pooche ki pyar kya he
to kya ek zindagi samjhane me tammam nahi hogi?
ye jo shiddat se ek naam nikala tha
is naam ke yyad ane se subah sham nahi hogi?
jo socha wo agar mil bhi jaye mujhko
to kya takalluf-e- tohmat se har saans sarobaar nahi hogi?
dard see bhi loon hoton me agar saanse rok ke

to kya chehre ki aadat se takleef bayaan nahi hogi?

Dear Reader ,

So! here is my second blog address-whensoulsings.blogspot.com and here i am baffled and brunted by the nuances of technology. Partly triumphant for having created finally a new blog address on a new website and partly depressed (u might find me dead out of depression, if such a thing is possible!) for my incapacity to manage 2 blog accounts apart from 4 email ids and the respective passwords!

Having two blog accounts is a sense- less idea specially when all your friends know of both your accounts and paradoxically you claim to have created 'space for you soul'.Your heart sings'twice fooled yet not behaved' .For when i had initially started blogging i was juvinile enough to believe that i alone shall be here ..all alone . But i am not .Alor! perhaps i would create a third blog, for my heart alone? no! the good old paper diary is just fine and very convinient .

Why am i doing this sense less thing? partially to kill time ( nice metaphor , if u try and visualize it ,a friend told me!-KILLING TIME) and partially to cater to the desperation of a few other,as non-techno savy friends as me , who wanted to read my blog but cant open my other blog address!whew!

I dont even know whether i am sticking around here or not . lets see how much of killing- of -time can i go about!and i promise to keep it as boring as i can. and the colors shall be shades of pink most of the times(those who have read kulturny.livejournal should make sense of the last statement).

i shall keep the pattern of blogs very different here from my other blog .why? that, i think, shall add some sense to havng two blog accounts.how will i do it is what i am yet to decide.

Thanking you,

Yours faithfully,hope fully,

Kulturny Yet.